A man and his Obsessive Compulsive Disorder attend couples counseling to learn how to live together.
FADE IN:
A counsellor is sitting on a couch, facing two individuals, looking at a notebook.
COUNSELLOR
Well, it is a pleasure to meet you Alan.
I understand you’re here to talk about living with Obsessive Compulsive Disorder.
CUT TO:
Two individuals on a couch, a young man is nervously fiddling with his hands and a young woman begins speaking.
MOMMA-O
Uh, are you going to ask me what it’s like living with him?
The counsellor looks taken aback that the young woman speaks abruptly. The young man (Alan) looks increasingly tense.
COUNSELLOR
Oh I’m sorry, I didn’t see you there.
MOMMA-O
No no no, it’s fine, most people don’t even know I’m there. Unless of course they see Alan here counting his steps.
I’m like his own personal fit bit, right? Right? That’s funny right?
COUNSELLOR
Alan, so how long have you and OCD –
MOMMA-O
-I prefer Momma O-
COUNSELLOR
Known each other?
MOMMA-O
Since I was 12
COUNSELLOR
And you’ve been living together ever since?
I know this hasn’t been easy for you, for either of you.
What are some of the difficulties that you two have been experiencing?
Alan?
MOMMA-O
He’s not listening to you right now.
Don’t take it personally, he’s got other concerns on his mind.
COUNSELLOR
Like what?
MOMMA-O
Like how he’s going to get out of this room after we’re done talking.
COUNSELLOR
Excuse me?
MOMMA-O
All due respect doctor, you seem pretty hygienic and stuff,
But do you really understand, how much dangerous bacteria is on that doorknob?
COUNSELLOR
I can assure you, it’s perfectly clean.
MOMMA-O
Can you really?
COUNSELLOR
Alan –
MOMMA-O
Have you ever heard of Escherichia oli? That’s fecal matter.
COUNSELLOR
Alan, please look at me.
MOMMA-O
Look at him!
COUNSELLOR
Alan, there is nothing to worry about, nothing bad is going to happen.
MOMMA-O
Alan, something bad is going to happen.
COUNSELLOR
Stop it! He doesn’t need you lying to him.
MOMMA-O
You’re lying to him!
COUNSELLOR
That’s ridiculous.
MOMMA-O
How is you saying ‘nothing bad will happen’ is any more ridiculous than me saying that something will?
COUNSELLOR
There is no evidence to say that anything bad is going to happen.
MOMMA-O
And there’s no evidence that says nothing won’t happen either.
COUNSELLOR
Alan, everything is going to be fine, it’s just your brain.
MOMMA-O
Whoa whoa whoa, it’s just his brain?
Like he can logic his way out of this?
Oh doctor, doctor, he’s having a heart attack!
Oh no, don’t worry, it’s just his heart, he’ll be fine if he stops being stupid
COUNSELLOR
That is quite enough.
MOMMA-O
Is that what you’re trying to say? Am I getting the right picture here?
COUNSELLOR
Stop it!
MOMMA-O
Relax, we’re just joking around.
COUNSELLOR
If you two are going to make this work you’re going to have to find a balance of control
You guys are together now, for life.
How you learn to live with each other is going to make or break you.
It isn’t going to be easy, but you have to learn what is safe and healthy,
And what is destructive as f__
I want you two to face each other, go on.
Now I want you to hold each other’s hand.
MOMMA-O
That’s not going to happen.
COUNSELLOR
This isn’t up to you Momma O
ALAN
Excuse me
CUT TO: Alan gets up from the couch, and leaves the room.
Discuss